So I’ve come to the understanding the I am in love with ‘the chase’ and am probably incapable of true love. This epiphany came to me when I realized that I like the thought of pursuing girls more than actually being with them. Don’t get me wrong I like being with girls or more succinctly a girl but am incapable of setting my priorities towards them and/or their children.
Further study has shown that while I love my family I am also unable to give attention to them when it means I would have to stop what I’m doing to hang out with them. Which while I realize this and also feel bad about it am unable to change that fact at the same time.
I dunno if there will ever be a place for me in this world in that scenario… But who knows only time will tell.